Healthy Boundaries/Self-care verses Control

Shifting from controlling, enabling behavior is a process that begins with the recognition of the need to develop healthy boundaries.

The ability to recognize the need for healthy boundaries often follows months or years of attempting to control, fix, manage or take care of another person with minimal to no lasting success leaving you feeling frustrated, angry, bitter and emotionally and physically exhausted. One does not start out with the intention of controlling it happens incrementally as you become more and more invested in the outcome of the other. Before you know it your life has become consumed with the well-being of the other. Caring for the other is spilling over into your daily life causing you to neglect self, others, important interests and emotional and physical needs of your own.

Control: An act or attempt to command, dictate, manipulate or force another person to behave in a manner that you desire. You will do as I say or else…

Healthy Boundaries: The process of defining and communicating limits that help protect you emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. This is the manner and condition of the support in which I am able/willing to offer…

Monitoring: An arrangement established for observing, assessing, examining, assisting and supporting another’s behavioral changes/goals.